The Bilge Pumps - The Farmer

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There was an old farmer who lived by a rock
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He sat in the meadow a shaking is fist
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At some boys who were down by the crick
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Their feet in the water their hands on their marbles
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And play things and in days of yore
There came a young lady she looked like a 
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Pretty young creature she sat on the grass
She pulled up her dresses and showed us her 
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Ruffles and laces laughed like a duck
She said she was learning a new way to 
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Bring up her children and learn them to knit
While the boys in the barnyard were shoveling
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Refuse and litter from yesterday’s hunt
While the girl in the meadow was rubbing her
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Eyes at the fellas like girls sometimes do
To make it clear that she wanted to 
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Go for a nice pleasant stroll on the grass
Then hurry back home for a nice piece of
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Ice cream and cake that was three layers tall
And after desert she was ready to
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Go for another walk down by the dock
With any young man with the sizable
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Roll of one hundreds and a big bulge up front
If he’d asked politely she’d show him her  
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Little pet dog who was subject to fits
And maybe she’d let him grab hold of her
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Small tender hands with a movement so quick
Then she’d bend on over and suck on his
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Soda so sweetly till she finished it
Then pulled down her panties to rub on her
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Hip that she bruised when she ran down the hall
Cause he tried to force her to lick on his
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Candy so tasty made of butter scotch 
And then he spread whip cream all over her
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Cookies that she had been baking all night
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If you think this is dirty you’re f**king damn right.

?'s buffdixie at yahoo.com