Tylenol
By Jesse Welles
Written by Jesse Welles (he posted this song on his Youtube on 9/29/25)
Tabbed from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KwmOeR9Vags
Tabbed by Larry Mofle
9/29/2025


        C                                    F                         C
Back in April, RFK went on the TV, he said a lot of stuff could use my fixin'
          F                       C                   G
If you'll remember, he said by September he would get down to the bottom of autism
          C                                        F                   C
Well, the days tick by and the time arrived and he didn't have much to show
     F                                C                                G             C  
He's getting pretty stressed until he looked into his desk and found a bottle of Tylenol


Chorus:
    F                            C
Tylenol, our problems start with Tylenol
       G                              C           C7
I'm so glad we found the one and only cause of it all
F                            C
Who needs evidence when your pal's the president
           G                 G7              C
And you're standing with the great wizard of Oz, mahaha


    F                            C
Tylenol, our problems stem from acetaminophen
               G               G7                C            C7
Though give me credit where it counts at least I manage to pronounce
          F                        C 
Well, the problems in the cabinet, problems in the purse
       G                          C
Sure a fever kills a baby but the Tylenol is worse
             F                                     C
It ain't the pesticides, the processed foods or pollution seeping in
       D7                              G           G7
And it wouldn't, simply couldn't never ever be the men


            F                             C  
What's this strange preoccupation, neurodivergent-folk fixation
     G                G7              C
What exactly are they striking out to fix
       F                                 C
If the people aren't convinced with your hateful rhetoric
            G
Perhaps the malady resides with all you dicks


Chorus